Thursday, November 25, 2010

Giving Thanks

Today is a day to be thankful for what you have and to focus on the positive side of life. Even my horoscope told me to concentrate on the upside.

Admittedly, I've been feeling anything other than FUNemployed. For the past two weeks, I've been feeling really low. I've been feeling like a 36-year old chronically single, financially strapped, jobless loser with no plan. I think it started with seeing The Company Men and continued with repeated rejections from potential employers (the form rejection email is truly disheartening) and literary agents regarding my book proposal. Add an appalling date to the mix and it's a perfect recipe for mudsliding quickly to the bottom.

I sing the praises of FUNemployment and believe me, I really love having my own time to do as I please. And I think I've done pretty well keeping my spirits up over the course of my unemployment. But the financial reality is that I need a job. Unemployment isn't enough to sustain my existence and I'm running out of things to sell on eBay. I've been applying to jobs (probably more than 100) since September. The little feedback that I've received has been negative.

Last week, I actually looked up to the sky and asked God/The Universe for help (despite being agnostic for 20 years). I whispered, "I give up. I'm clearly not able to figure this out on my own. So help me. Because I need it. And since you live in the super large sky, you must be doing something right. Or more right than I am."

It's with this frame of mind that I traveled back to the east coast to see my parents and friends. It is through the support and love of a very good friend (that's you, Susan) and my mom that I am finally making a turn for the better. I have a lot of wonderful people in my life and a lot of things going for me. I just have to believe in me. Because there are a lot of other people who do, so the least I can do is join them.

So I give thanks for all that I have and all that will come. I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday and focus on all of the amazing things in your life.

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